Definition - #301 - #09 - The question that solves “ALL”!

(“If you’re stuck in a rut, it’s because you don’t have a “successful alternative!!”)

Suppose I gave you a standard question that stops all argument and meaningless discussion?
(However, it’s a question that requires a “moderated” answer ….a true answer to a question! Not another vague “for instance”, or, “my uncle used to say”, or, “I believe ….” NO!… It must be a true answer to the specific question!)

(So here it is …)**** “What’s the successful alternative?” ****

The true answer starts with the words … “A successful alternative is ….” (or might be) ….

You start with these words and I’ll listen to you all day!!!

BUT!!! .. Start with “For instance…”, or, “Another way to look at it is…” or anything else; and I would rather take a nice warm bath!!!

The question calls for a specific response… i.e. “A successful alternative!!!” Not a criticism, not a description, not “anything else”!!! …. Just a “specific response!!!!
This “question” stops meetings, family arguments, political tirades, complaints, etc.

No one is currently being challenged for a constructive idea, namely, “a successful alternative”. There’s usually immediate silence!! But human nature being what it is, you are liable to begin to hear…”Well. for instance…”

It’s now necessary to call “time”!! ….to remind people that you have asked a specific question which requires a specific “answer”!! This is my reference to a “moderated response”. You lose all the advantages of “the question” if you don’t immediately have people stay within the rules….. “A successful alternative is …”

Most people have not been trained; or, have not been made aware of, the direct way to answer a specific question. In fact, most people never do answer directly. They will usually postulate a different question or circumstance as an answer to a question. Perhaps not having an immediate, appropriate answer causes them to become insecure and their immediate response is supposed to gain “time”. You will also get a “defensive”, aggressive response from people who, either, don’t have a response or become defensive when they are out of ideas. It’s very revealing!!!

Such a simple question .. “What’s the successful alternative?”

What a revealing response you can get. One thing for sure; if you have a little control over the path of the discussion (as a moderator), it will become quite silent. The comments that follow will become more meaningful, more useful. (No more shouting. … No more “oral static”)

(It, also, just might start the exchanges in a search for a “mutual” definition!!! …Wouldn’t that be nice!!!!)