First we’ll start to attack the Martyr vs. Saint “thing”….
“Saints” seem to require a church like or religious significance. “Martyrs” seem to be less “religious”. Both seem to be willing “to stand for something” despite popular opinion. Both , by this observation, seem willing to “chance” something despite a formidable reaction. The judgement of what they do or a willing to “stand for” is made by the persons they “stand up to”! If you’re a Palestinian, you have an opposite view to the “stand up for” than the Israeli. One is “for”, one is “against”. But the person who makes the stand is an agreeable “martyr” or a “horrible terrorist” depending on which side you’re on.
But the “survivor” doesn’t take any “stand” at all. He is willing to “just survive”! To attempt to mutually communicate with the two groups at the same time seems impossible. Neither side, it seems, is willing to share. Both sides seem only to want to vent their opinions. There is nothing to be learned from this “venting” because there is no meaningful, logical sharing of ideas.
I was considering this subject in the light of the possible futility of trying to get people to “understand” who are not motivated to do anything but “slide along” … “survive”. Why engage in this type of activity? Why write a “Dinosaur” book? Why address students in hopes of awakening in them a desire to “think”, a desire to “mutually communicate more definitively”?
It is a question that interests me greatly. Perhaps my thinking is wrong! Perhaps all this is a waste of time? I know it’s not a waste of “my” time, but perhaps it’s a waste of other people’s time? It continues to arrest my attention. It is in this light that “Martyrs”, “Saints” and “Survivors” are possible interests to be “explored”.
************************************************************************************
I know I’m “losing” but I don’t know what to do about it!!
“It’s too complicated!” … “I’m too busy!” …. Don’t bother me! “I’m just trying to make a living!”
Well, if you’re these things, you may wake up one day and find a lot more to be “bothered” about!!
When do you start “caring”? …. When do you really become aware of somebody else?
I hope you’ll consider these Essays. I can’t “make” you. All I can do is “try”!
Friday, February 29, 2008
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Personal - #501 - #07 – What’s a “religion”?
Everybody is “for or against” one, but what is “it”…. exactly?
For thousands of years people have killed each other over the “right religion”.
Whose “God” is the right one?
Which “book” is the only, correct one?
Which standards are the only, acceptable ones?
If you believe in the wrong one, will you come to a good “end”?
What is “the” correct “end”?
We sure have a problem! We are supposed to avoid even the discussion of religion. Religion is such a powder packed subject that the mere discussion of it is dangerous. Yet, this is supposed to bring us peace and harmony!…. Yeah, but which religion is supposed to bring us peace and harmony?
I’ll kill you until you believe as I believe! I’ll make war on you so I can give you “peace”!!
Does this make any sense? … any sense at all??
What are we talking about … exactly?
Are we talking about a particular group who has a name? A particular group that is guided by some written or orally handed down set of rules or standards? As a matter of fact, who interprets these standards? Who chose “these interpreters”? What are “their” particular characteristics? Because they are human, they have a limited lifespan. Then, who takes “their” place? Who chooses “them”? Are they exact duplicates of the ones that went before “them”? If not, what about the “newer” interpretations? What about “exact continuity”?
Could it be that each person may have his own idea of what a religion is to them? …. Of what a religion means to them? … Of what the “meaning and use” religion is to them?
Could it be that “many people” are different? “Many” have different interpretations of their religion? So how come a large group gets together and uses war to make “others” believe the same as they do when “they” even have different ideas about what “they” think? (And, also, the ideas may be slightly different from decade to decade.)
First, is there any rational, any understandable reason how one group gets united about differing ideas?
Second, without having exact duplicate ideas, how can you act in a united fashion?
Thirdly, is this really “one” religion or is it just a “group name”? …generally calling itself something?
We have not addressed the root question of a “definition” of a religion!
Let’s try! It’s not for you to agree or disagree with. If you can do better, please be my guest!!!
Here goes….
A “RELIGION” is:
1. An oral or written group of ideas that are presented as a label called “religion”.
2. In most cases a religion tries to give an answer for the “infinite” questions of life. (At least not understandable from the finite human mind’s restricted point of view. It is a restriction that makes the understanding of the “infinite” incomprehensible. Words like “nothing”, “all”, “every”, “none”, “life” (it’s beginning and it’s so called medical “end”), space, vacuum, nothing, never, etc. These are all “infinite” concepts.)
3. These questions of “infinity” are troubling to the human mind, because it perceives everything with a boundary of some sort. “Space” is bounded by ….? …. “Never”? ....in what time period? ….. “All” meaning in what time period or in what “space”? …. And on and on! (We could have a separate chapter on each of these “infinite” words…)
4. Each so-called “religion” has it’s own way of trying to resolve these questions. To accept and believe these answers without scientific or sensory fact, is called “faith”. You simply must accept certain ideas on “faith”. These “faith” answers are the basis for “religions”. “The happy hunting ground”, “the sun”, the “after life”, the “river Jordan”, the “soul”, etc. all focus on the same general human concern. What’s at the “end”? These “ideas of faith” are possible answers to this queasy feeling we all have about our inability to answer “infinite” questions.
5. Can it be that the various and individual answers to these “human unanswerables” are the basis of thousands of years of killing and misunderstanding? Is this what we mean by “religions”?
And now a “story”….
Some people live at the very edge of a large, deep, black hole. In fact, some are hanging on the very edge from a fragile branch by a finger. Some are at the edge of the black hole looking in. Some others live a mile away and are aware of the black hole, but aren’t deeply concerned. And some live thousands of miles from the black hole and hardly are aware of its existence, or, as a matter of fact, do not care about “not knowing” about the black hole, altogether.
For those who are concerned to one degree or another, there should be something they can think about that will make their distress more tolerable. It really doesn’t make a difference as to what that is, providing it is consistent, living, and believable to them. It relieves their stress. It might even take their stress away. It’s not what they think, it’s what happens when they think a certain thing.
And now…. About the “rules” and “standards”…….
When a name is given to a group, and the group can accept a certain way of answering the “human unanswerables”, there is usually a description of some sort that is also accepted by the group. This “story” or “description” tries to weave the “unanswerables” into something that is easy to recognize, easy to remember, easy to teach and easy to pass on. Words like a “god’, a “Happy Hunting Ground”, a “being”, a “soul”, etc. begin to be related to the “story”. They begin to have a “group meaning” which is derived from the “group accepted” story. It begins to make sense to the people who have the same “story”, the “group story”. If it works to the benefit of the individuals in the “group” it is successful.
But what if “my” group has a different “story”? What if “my” story works for “my” group? Is one a better “story” than the other?
So we have a war so that I can force you to accept my “story” as the “only” one! ….Great, isn’t it?
Shouldn’t it occur to a thinking person that the story only works for the “believer” of the story because of his “belief”. …..it works for him …. It’s his faith!!!
Therefore, isn’t a religion a “personal belief”?? ……….
Call the different groups what you will, the fact remains that a “religion”, in the context of what is written here, is a collection of “stories and ideas” which help make people feel better about the “human unanswerables”.
I hope this is not too simple! Heaven forbid!
Note: The “moral rules” and ethics that are included in the “religion” (but are not directly connected to answering the “human unanswerables”) are not often the same. They are an attempt at rules of human and social conduct that are supposed to make living together easier and more worthwhile. Each environment may need slightly different rules. Values may NOT be the same either.
Could it be that we really want to force our “rules” on others and not our answers to the “human unanswerables”?
Could “rules” and ethics be the problem, the real problem?Do we really want everyone to have “our standards”? Do we have a tolerance for different standards?
Perhaps in “my” house, in “my” land”, I wish to have “my” standards. What about in “your” house? Do you want my “standards”. Should I force you to have “my” standards?
How do I handle the question of different standards in different houses, in different lands?
Perhaps “standards” are the real issues!
The discussion of “a religion” will “never” be the problem!
For thousands of years people have killed each other over the “right religion”.
Whose “God” is the right one?
Which “book” is the only, correct one?
Which standards are the only, acceptable ones?
If you believe in the wrong one, will you come to a good “end”?
What is “the” correct “end”?
We sure have a problem! We are supposed to avoid even the discussion of religion. Religion is such a powder packed subject that the mere discussion of it is dangerous. Yet, this is supposed to bring us peace and harmony!…. Yeah, but which religion is supposed to bring us peace and harmony?
I’ll kill you until you believe as I believe! I’ll make war on you so I can give you “peace”!!
Does this make any sense? … any sense at all??
What are we talking about … exactly?
Are we talking about a particular group who has a name? A particular group that is guided by some written or orally handed down set of rules or standards? As a matter of fact, who interprets these standards? Who chose “these interpreters”? What are “their” particular characteristics? Because they are human, they have a limited lifespan. Then, who takes “their” place? Who chooses “them”? Are they exact duplicates of the ones that went before “them”? If not, what about the “newer” interpretations? What about “exact continuity”?
Could it be that each person may have his own idea of what a religion is to them? …. Of what a religion means to them? … Of what the “meaning and use” religion is to them?
Could it be that “many people” are different? “Many” have different interpretations of their religion? So how come a large group gets together and uses war to make “others” believe the same as they do when “they” even have different ideas about what “they” think? (And, also, the ideas may be slightly different from decade to decade.)
First, is there any rational, any understandable reason how one group gets united about differing ideas?
Second, without having exact duplicate ideas, how can you act in a united fashion?
Thirdly, is this really “one” religion or is it just a “group name”? …generally calling itself something?
We have not addressed the root question of a “definition” of a religion!
Let’s try! It’s not for you to agree or disagree with. If you can do better, please be my guest!!!
Here goes….
A “RELIGION” is:
1. An oral or written group of ideas that are presented as a label called “religion”.
2. In most cases a religion tries to give an answer for the “infinite” questions of life. (At least not understandable from the finite human mind’s restricted point of view. It is a restriction that makes the understanding of the “infinite” incomprehensible. Words like “nothing”, “all”, “every”, “none”, “life” (it’s beginning and it’s so called medical “end”), space, vacuum, nothing, never, etc. These are all “infinite” concepts.)
3. These questions of “infinity” are troubling to the human mind, because it perceives everything with a boundary of some sort. “Space” is bounded by ….? …. “Never”? ....in what time period? ….. “All” meaning in what time period or in what “space”? …. And on and on! (We could have a separate chapter on each of these “infinite” words…)
4. Each so-called “religion” has it’s own way of trying to resolve these questions. To accept and believe these answers without scientific or sensory fact, is called “faith”. You simply must accept certain ideas on “faith”. These “faith” answers are the basis for “religions”. “The happy hunting ground”, “the sun”, the “after life”, the “river Jordan”, the “soul”, etc. all focus on the same general human concern. What’s at the “end”? These “ideas of faith” are possible answers to this queasy feeling we all have about our inability to answer “infinite” questions.
5. Can it be that the various and individual answers to these “human unanswerables” are the basis of thousands of years of killing and misunderstanding? Is this what we mean by “religions”?
And now a “story”….
Some people live at the very edge of a large, deep, black hole. In fact, some are hanging on the very edge from a fragile branch by a finger. Some are at the edge of the black hole looking in. Some others live a mile away and are aware of the black hole, but aren’t deeply concerned. And some live thousands of miles from the black hole and hardly are aware of its existence, or, as a matter of fact, do not care about “not knowing” about the black hole, altogether.
For those who are concerned to one degree or another, there should be something they can think about that will make their distress more tolerable. It really doesn’t make a difference as to what that is, providing it is consistent, living, and believable to them. It relieves their stress. It might even take their stress away. It’s not what they think, it’s what happens when they think a certain thing.
And now…. About the “rules” and “standards”…….
When a name is given to a group, and the group can accept a certain way of answering the “human unanswerables”, there is usually a description of some sort that is also accepted by the group. This “story” or “description” tries to weave the “unanswerables” into something that is easy to recognize, easy to remember, easy to teach and easy to pass on. Words like a “god’, a “Happy Hunting Ground”, a “being”, a “soul”, etc. begin to be related to the “story”. They begin to have a “group meaning” which is derived from the “group accepted” story. It begins to make sense to the people who have the same “story”, the “group story”. If it works to the benefit of the individuals in the “group” it is successful.
But what if “my” group has a different “story”? What if “my” story works for “my” group? Is one a better “story” than the other?
So we have a war so that I can force you to accept my “story” as the “only” one! ….Great, isn’t it?
Shouldn’t it occur to a thinking person that the story only works for the “believer” of the story because of his “belief”. …..it works for him …. It’s his faith!!!
Therefore, isn’t a religion a “personal belief”?? ……….
Call the different groups what you will, the fact remains that a “religion”, in the context of what is written here, is a collection of “stories and ideas” which help make people feel better about the “human unanswerables”.
I hope this is not too simple! Heaven forbid!
Note: The “moral rules” and ethics that are included in the “religion” (but are not directly connected to answering the “human unanswerables”) are not often the same. They are an attempt at rules of human and social conduct that are supposed to make living together easier and more worthwhile. Each environment may need slightly different rules. Values may NOT be the same either.
Could it be that we really want to force our “rules” on others and not our answers to the “human unanswerables”?
Could “rules” and ethics be the problem, the real problem?Do we really want everyone to have “our standards”? Do we have a tolerance for different standards?
Perhaps in “my” house, in “my” land”, I wish to have “my” standards. What about in “your” house? Do you want my “standards”. Should I force you to have “my” standards?
How do I handle the question of different standards in different houses, in different lands?
Perhaps “standards” are the real issues!
The discussion of “a religion” will “never” be the problem!
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Personal - #501 - #05 – I’m at a loss as to where I “fit in” now.
I’m losing the feeling of graciousness, peacefulness, and calm that should surround me.
I’m at a loss as to how to successfully deal with a culture or language other than “American”.
I’m at a loss as to what we’re supposed to do with people who live amongst us but are not interested in our rules, laws, or customs.
I’m at a loss as to how to deal with a communication that has no reason, or, no logic in it.
I’m at a loss as to how to interest, or, to motivate someone to try a new idea, a new approach.
*************************************************************************************
True…. I’ve got some choices. But I don’t like the choices I seem to want to make.
I don’t want to retreat. I don’t want to “hide”. I don’t want to be just “polite” and “politically correct”.
I do want to try and “contribute”. I do want to find an answer to, or at least, improve these conditions. I really do!!!
But , look at the rhetoric of the talking heads in the “media”, the “activist” groups, the cries of the “funded” minorities, the messages that are most often “released” to the public.
Where am I? …. I’m at a loss as to where I fit in!
I don’t want to be “negative”. I don’t want to be “against”.
But where do I look for “successful alternatives”? …. Where do I find suggestions that give me hope for an improvement….. not even a “solution”! There might be no ultimate solution! But where is there an “improvement”?
What do you actually do when over 20% of the people living in America do not speak English in their homes. How do we offer opportunities to someone who doesn’t speak English unless they cluster together in “like-speaking” groups and survive with the opportunities that are offered by that particular group. But then, who pays for the social services required by that “self-isolated” group? Are they not “self-isolated” by their choices? Is “self-isolation” to be supported and aided by the “general public”?
Suppose the time is too short for an immigrant to learn the language? How long is “enough” time? Does the time allotted change with the age of the person? Who decides? Who decides if one generation is enough? How long is the “general public” supposed to support the services of people who want the advantages of American citizenship but want their own original culture as a continuing “way of life”?
Why should “rich” communities subsidize poor communities. What’s the advantage of becoming “rich”?
Are we “strengthening” America by approving this continuing “way”, or, do we have to change this direction? Who is going to decide? How do we avoid inevitable conflict?
How do I offer or motivate someone with whom I can’t communicate?
How can I deal with this alien culture or language? It seems overwhelming.
How can I continue to be ruled by laws and customs that are either not being obeyed or not understood?
Is the price of citizenship the price of being an American … in culture, in language, in customs and law?
OR what is the price??? ….. I’m at a loss!!
Here’s what I “might” be able to do!
1- Do I simply “abdicate… vanish … give up and merely survive?” First , I must stay engaged…. (I do not “disengage”, do not turn away, do not “hide.”)
2- Suppose I keep getting as informed as I can from the sources I personally feel are logical and reasonable. (I disregard the obvious rhetoric of parties that are merely advocating an issue … a one point of view tirade.)
3- Suppose I try to create my own point of view from the information and experiences I now have.
4- Suppose I continue to write and speak my own point of view. I throw it out there to all who would listen and the remaining few who would stop and consider.
5- Suppose I try not to expect anything in return….. no answers, no consideration or evaluation, no anything!
6- Suppose I consider this is now the best that I can contribute now……
I must learn to live with this!!!
I’m at a loss as to how to successfully deal with a culture or language other than “American”.
I’m at a loss as to what we’re supposed to do with people who live amongst us but are not interested in our rules, laws, or customs.
I’m at a loss as to how to deal with a communication that has no reason, or, no logic in it.
I’m at a loss as to how to interest, or, to motivate someone to try a new idea, a new approach.
*************************************************************************************
True…. I’ve got some choices. But I don’t like the choices I seem to want to make.
I don’t want to retreat. I don’t want to “hide”. I don’t want to be just “polite” and “politically correct”.
I do want to try and “contribute”. I do want to find an answer to, or at least, improve these conditions. I really do!!!
But , look at the rhetoric of the talking heads in the “media”, the “activist” groups, the cries of the “funded” minorities, the messages that are most often “released” to the public.
Where am I? …. I’m at a loss as to where I fit in!
I don’t want to be “negative”. I don’t want to be “against”.
But where do I look for “successful alternatives”? …. Where do I find suggestions that give me hope for an improvement….. not even a “solution”! There might be no ultimate solution! But where is there an “improvement”?
What do you actually do when over 20% of the people living in America do not speak English in their homes. How do we offer opportunities to someone who doesn’t speak English unless they cluster together in “like-speaking” groups and survive with the opportunities that are offered by that particular group. But then, who pays for the social services required by that “self-isolated” group? Are they not “self-isolated” by their choices? Is “self-isolation” to be supported and aided by the “general public”?
Suppose the time is too short for an immigrant to learn the language? How long is “enough” time? Does the time allotted change with the age of the person? Who decides? Who decides if one generation is enough? How long is the “general public” supposed to support the services of people who want the advantages of American citizenship but want their own original culture as a continuing “way of life”?
Why should “rich” communities subsidize poor communities. What’s the advantage of becoming “rich”?
Are we “strengthening” America by approving this continuing “way”, or, do we have to change this direction? Who is going to decide? How do we avoid inevitable conflict?
How do I offer or motivate someone with whom I can’t communicate?
How can I deal with this alien culture or language? It seems overwhelming.
How can I continue to be ruled by laws and customs that are either not being obeyed or not understood?
Is the price of citizenship the price of being an American … in culture, in language, in customs and law?
OR what is the price??? ….. I’m at a loss!!
Here’s what I “might” be able to do!
1- Do I simply “abdicate… vanish … give up and merely survive?” First , I must stay engaged…. (I do not “disengage”, do not turn away, do not “hide.”)
2- Suppose I keep getting as informed as I can from the sources I personally feel are logical and reasonable. (I disregard the obvious rhetoric of parties that are merely advocating an issue … a one point of view tirade.)
3- Suppose I try to create my own point of view from the information and experiences I now have.
4- Suppose I continue to write and speak my own point of view. I throw it out there to all who would listen and the remaining few who would stop and consider.
5- Suppose I try not to expect anything in return….. no answers, no consideration or evaluation, no anything!
6- Suppose I consider this is now the best that I can contribute now……
I must learn to live with this!!!
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Personal - #501 - #04 – I’m at a loss as to…..“What to expect now from, what I believe, is a true friend?”
Is it “my” fault?
Do I expect something that isn’t there?
What told me that this was a “true” friend?
Wouldn’t it be nice if all our expectations were met?
Anything we believe would, indeed, happen…. Life could be so simple!
But I’m afraid, life is truly not so simple!
We cannot avoid investigating our thoughts and beliefs. We cannot merely “believe”! There is a great gap between what we may believe and what the real life facts are. We can imbue characteristics in people who are next to us that are, truly, not there! What a disappointment!!
We build ourselves up to believe what we want to believe. Then it happens! We are destroyed! Our beliefs are betrayed. It never occurs to us that our “belief” was never, in fact, there.
It seems that we do not spend enough time considering the basis of our “beliefs”. We simply want to believe!
Do we diminish our good feelings of trust if we “consider” our beliefs? On the contrary, the more we check the more positive we may become. And if were wrong? …. Just look in the mirror at somebody who simply made a mistake. After all we’re not machine perfect! It’s just a simple, human mistake. A person does not have to “fall apart” over a simple human mistake.
But if you don’t ever “check” … or “consider” … you may be suddenly surprised at the sudden reality that your “true friend” never was “your true friend”! “Considering” and “checking” from time to time can reinforce your “good” feelings and certainly diminish the effects of sudden disappointments.
By the way, what you think is terribly important today may not be so terribly important tomorrow. The characteristics you felt were very important may be of different “value” today!
Now … is this a “true” friend, or, just a friend? Do I have the same “ value” of our friendship today?
How many times in your life would you believe the “value” of a “friendship” changed? It’s not terrible if you thought about it, instead of taking things for granted. Some relationships grow more “valuable” the more you know. Some relationships grow “less important” the more you know. Either way, if you, at least, “consider”, you’ll be less surprised and more comfortable.
After all … “What’s the Successful Alternative?”
Do I expect something that isn’t there?
What told me that this was a “true” friend?
Wouldn’t it be nice if all our expectations were met?
Anything we believe would, indeed, happen…. Life could be so simple!
But I’m afraid, life is truly not so simple!
We cannot avoid investigating our thoughts and beliefs. We cannot merely “believe”! There is a great gap between what we may believe and what the real life facts are. We can imbue characteristics in people who are next to us that are, truly, not there! What a disappointment!!
We build ourselves up to believe what we want to believe. Then it happens! We are destroyed! Our beliefs are betrayed. It never occurs to us that our “belief” was never, in fact, there.
It seems that we do not spend enough time considering the basis of our “beliefs”. We simply want to believe!
Do we diminish our good feelings of trust if we “consider” our beliefs? On the contrary, the more we check the more positive we may become. And if were wrong? …. Just look in the mirror at somebody who simply made a mistake. After all we’re not machine perfect! It’s just a simple, human mistake. A person does not have to “fall apart” over a simple human mistake.
But if you don’t ever “check” … or “consider” … you may be suddenly surprised at the sudden reality that your “true friend” never was “your true friend”! “Considering” and “checking” from time to time can reinforce your “good” feelings and certainly diminish the effects of sudden disappointments.
By the way, what you think is terribly important today may not be so terribly important tomorrow. The characteristics you felt were very important may be of different “value” today!
Now … is this a “true” friend, or, just a friend? Do I have the same “ value” of our friendship today?
How many times in your life would you believe the “value” of a “friendship” changed? It’s not terrible if you thought about it, instead of taking things for granted. Some relationships grow more “valuable” the more you know. Some relationships grow “less important” the more you know. Either way, if you, at least, “consider”, you’ll be less surprised and more comfortable.
After all … “What’s the Successful Alternative?”
Monday, February 25, 2008
Personal - #501 - #03 – How do you know when you’re “old”?
You have finally coped with, dealt with, defeated, and experienced all sorts of things. Some were good, some were bad. “But you did experience these things!”
You found some solutions, some improvements; and sometimes, you found out there were no solutions.
Again …. “But you did experience these things!”
How do you know you’ve gotten “old”?
You finally realize that there’s no one to tell, no one to share with!
You finally realize that even though you have all this experience, no one is interested!
You cannot do anything useful with this life full of experiences!
That’s when you realize you have finally gotten old!
Well, what’s so useful about that?
You can come to realize that you cannot be discouraged if no one bothers to listen.
You can come to realize that you cannot be disheartened if no one heeds your advice.
You can come to realize that you cannot be disheartened if you cannot prevent trouble.
That’s what’s so useful…. You cannot be disheartened!
Well, what can you do? (What’s the “successful alternative?)
You can continue to try!!!
Your success does not lie in the success of the results.
Your success is the self satisfaction that you have done your best…. (“You cannot be disheartened!”)
You try and use your best understanding of your own experience; and, your best definition of the experience in which you’re now involved. You use your best communication skills, your best emotional skills, and your best sense of compassion. That’s simply the “best” you have to offer!
Remember….. “You cannot be disheartened!”
Even though you finally realize you’re “old”, you still can enjoy “offering”!
Your success is in the “offering”! …. Not the results!!!
After all, “what’s the successful alternative”?
You found some solutions, some improvements; and sometimes, you found out there were no solutions.
Again …. “But you did experience these things!”
How do you know you’ve gotten “old”?
You finally realize that there’s no one to tell, no one to share with!
You finally realize that even though you have all this experience, no one is interested!
You cannot do anything useful with this life full of experiences!
That’s when you realize you have finally gotten old!
Well, what’s so useful about that?
You can come to realize that you cannot be discouraged if no one bothers to listen.
You can come to realize that you cannot be disheartened if no one heeds your advice.
You can come to realize that you cannot be disheartened if you cannot prevent trouble.
That’s what’s so useful…. You cannot be disheartened!
Well, what can you do? (What’s the “successful alternative?)
You can continue to try!!!
Your success does not lie in the success of the results.
Your success is the self satisfaction that you have done your best…. (“You cannot be disheartened!”)
You try and use your best understanding of your own experience; and, your best definition of the experience in which you’re now involved. You use your best communication skills, your best emotional skills, and your best sense of compassion. That’s simply the “best” you have to offer!
Remember….. “You cannot be disheartened!”
Even though you finally realize you’re “old”, you still can enjoy “offering”!
Your success is in the “offering”! …. Not the results!!!
After all, “what’s the successful alternative”?
Sunday, February 24, 2008
Personal - #501- #02 - How many different “World Views” are there and how to cope?
How different the “World View” must seem to the naked natives running around in the Brazilian rain forest with a sharp stick in his hand looking for a green frog. His “World View” is as far as he can walk in the deep forest. He believes in the power of birds, clouds, and spirits. He’s never seen concrete structures, “running water”, “bathrooms” or “schools”!!
Compare his “World View” with a man who is getting paid in money and regular food to “destroy “ the enemy. He has no skill except as a warrior. His “world” is flat, with his enemies just over the horizon or closer. He doesn’t care about “terror”, “prisoners” or nations. He’s simply paid to “destroy”. What’s his “World View”?
And compare the “World View” of an ordinary citizen of an industrial country that has things like “welfare”, politics, schools, neighborhoods, religions, etc. How different are his views? His experiences are entirely different from jungles or mercenaries.
How many different “World Views” are there? Can there be only one approach to living, one approach to survival, one selection of morals, rules, and behavior?
And yet we hear of “total solutions”, “better ways”, elimination of “poverty, violence and terror”. Whose definitions do we use for these words? Which “World View” is a guide to what we are supposed to follow?
It is not enough to say “civilized”! By what standard are we to use? What’s right or wrong with the “other” “World View”?
And so it seems that any thinking person would first define the world he’s talking about before trying to suggest what path or ideals he suggests we follow. Just to “decry” the deficiencies or “lacks” of a particular situation without describing the “World” you are referencing to, is meaningless.
What is more…. Just to light fires of discontent without a plan to offer a “successful alternative”, is not only stupid but can be very harmful. Which “World” are you discussing? What is helpful in one “World” may be very damaging in another! ….Better be Careful!!!!
So “coping” with “Worlds” is possible if you attempt to first describe the “World” you’re using as a reference. You might find that just a discussion of the so-called “World” you are referring too will be very difficult. It may be very difficult to come to a “mutual” agreement, a “mutual definition”! What’s the sense in trying to suggest an improvement or a deficiency in a “World” of which you can’t even first reach a “mutual” definition? ….. This is more “oral static”!
(Bill T.’s definition of “oral static” is… “The proper placement of proper English words, in a proper English sentence, which means nothing!!!” … another word for “noise”!)
Beware of the “fire lighters”!!! They cause nothing but discontent!.
Look for the “definers” …the people who first try to have a “mutually agreed upon” frame of reference!!!
Compare his “World View” with a man who is getting paid in money and regular food to “destroy “ the enemy. He has no skill except as a warrior. His “world” is flat, with his enemies just over the horizon or closer. He doesn’t care about “terror”, “prisoners” or nations. He’s simply paid to “destroy”. What’s his “World View”?
And compare the “World View” of an ordinary citizen of an industrial country that has things like “welfare”, politics, schools, neighborhoods, religions, etc. How different are his views? His experiences are entirely different from jungles or mercenaries.
How many different “World Views” are there? Can there be only one approach to living, one approach to survival, one selection of morals, rules, and behavior?
And yet we hear of “total solutions”, “better ways”, elimination of “poverty, violence and terror”. Whose definitions do we use for these words? Which “World View” is a guide to what we are supposed to follow?
It is not enough to say “civilized”! By what standard are we to use? What’s right or wrong with the “other” “World View”?
And so it seems that any thinking person would first define the world he’s talking about before trying to suggest what path or ideals he suggests we follow. Just to “decry” the deficiencies or “lacks” of a particular situation without describing the “World” you are referencing to, is meaningless.
What is more…. Just to light fires of discontent without a plan to offer a “successful alternative”, is not only stupid but can be very harmful. Which “World” are you discussing? What is helpful in one “World” may be very damaging in another! ….Better be Careful!!!!
So “coping” with “Worlds” is possible if you attempt to first describe the “World” you’re using as a reference. You might find that just a discussion of the so-called “World” you are referring too will be very difficult. It may be very difficult to come to a “mutual” agreement, a “mutual definition”! What’s the sense in trying to suggest an improvement or a deficiency in a “World” of which you can’t even first reach a “mutual” definition? ….. This is more “oral static”!
(Bill T.’s definition of “oral static” is… “The proper placement of proper English words, in a proper English sentence, which means nothing!!!” … another word for “noise”!)
Beware of the “fire lighters”!!! They cause nothing but discontent!.
Look for the “definers” …the people who first try to have a “mutually agreed upon” frame of reference!!!
Sunday, February 17, 2008
Personal - #401- #01 - From Character Counts ... March 19, 2004
“Why I write anything.....
“Every day, teachers counsel students with high hopes and the best of intentions, never knowing whether anything they say will really make a difference.
What I came to understand is that "teachable moments" often arise unannounced and unnoticed and that teachers who want to help their students in a meaningful way have to have faith that, sometimes, what
they say and do really matters. The same is true for coaches and for parents.
But since we can`t always know when those "sometimes" occur, we have to act as if everything we say will matter.
If you do that, every once in a while all your efforts will be affirmed when someone gives you the wonderful gift of telling you that you changed his life.”
I wish I knew at least the names of the people who read this Blog.
I know how many I just wish to know if the same people are reading the Blog each time. I offer my Email glfstudent@gmail.com if you wish to use it.
I wonder if this is the reason I spend so much time writing?
I’m sending this off because.....
Affectionately, BT
“Every day, teachers counsel students with high hopes and the best of intentions, never knowing whether anything they say will really make a difference.
What I came to understand is that "teachable moments" often arise unannounced and unnoticed and that teachers who want to help their students in a meaningful way have to have faith that, sometimes, what
they say and do really matters. The same is true for coaches and for parents.
But since we can`t always know when those "sometimes" occur, we have to act as if everything we say will matter.
If you do that, every once in a while all your efforts will be affirmed when someone gives you the wonderful gift of telling you that you changed his life.”
I wish I knew at least the names of the people who read this Blog.
I know how many I just wish to know if the same people are reading the Blog each time. I offer my Email glfstudent@gmail.com if you wish to use it.
I wonder if this is the reason I spend so much time writing?
I’m sending this off because.....
Affectionately, BT
Saturday, February 16, 2008
Family - #401 - #11 – A “Challenge”!!
I would like to repeat – What’s “Education”?, and have you re-read this chapter.
Would you bring it to a friend of yours and have him read it?
Then, I would like to have you sit down with your friend and discuss this material. I would like you to use the techniques of “mutual definition” and “mutual understanding” in your discussion and see what happens!
I’m sure something will happen!
I know you will have an interesting adventure!
You may lose a so-called “friend”, or, you may change “just an acquaintance” into a new “life long friend”!!
I any event, this is the “challenge”!!
I hope you’ll try! …(I would like to be a quiet mouse in your pocket!!)
Here’s luck and success to you…..
“The Author”
Would you bring it to a friend of yours and have him read it?
Then, I would like to have you sit down with your friend and discuss this material. I would like you to use the techniques of “mutual definition” and “mutual understanding” in your discussion and see what happens!
I’m sure something will happen!
I know you will have an interesting adventure!
You may lose a so-called “friend”, or, you may change “just an acquaintance” into a new “life long friend”!!
I any event, this is the “challenge”!!
I hope you’ll try! …(I would like to be a quiet mouse in your pocket!!)
Here’s luck and success to you…..
“The Author”
Family - #401 - #10 –What’s “Education”? – What is it supposed to do? ... (This essay is long and expect to study!)
We spend more money on “Education” than almost anything else except defense!
But exactly what is "Education”?
It’s a lot of money but what are we spending it on??
Question: Are we trying to just pass on “facts”?
Query: We only have to buy an Encyclopedia for facts; or, go to the new internet for more facts.
**************
Question: Are we trying to be a “family” for students?
Query: If so, what do we try to teach as foster mothers and fathers? From where do the teachers come?... Who trains the teachers?
**************
Question: Are we trying to teach “self respect”, “self esteem”, “confidence”, or what?
Query: How do you do that? What do these words mean? Who gave the instructions? Who trained the teachers? Who decided to do that? What are their credentials?
***************
Question: Are we trying to “baby sit” for the day so parents can earn money?
Query: What kind of services and atmosphere should you provide? Who is going to make the rules? Who delegated them to make the rules? What are their credentials?
**************
Question: Is this a Government , State, City or Community matter?
Query: Who decides? What are their credentials? On what is the decision based?
**************
Question: Who gets the money? How much? From where does it come? Who decides?
Query: Is it dollars per student? Is there a special category of student? (i.e. Rich, Poor, Ethnic, Inner-city, etc.) Who decides on the criteria? Who delegated them to decide? What are their credentials?
***************
Question: Are we trying to teach students so they can get a job?
Query: What kind of a job? Who decides? What special type of training for what special type of job? How many “special jobs” are there? … What is a “trade school” for?… Is there a difference?… So!… what’s the difference?
***************
Question: What do we do for the malcontents, unmotivated, slow learners and the “violent”?
Query: Do we keep the class environment to the level of the lowest achievers? Do we spend whatever time is necessary to get a quiet, disciplined learning environment? How much time should that take from the class period? Who decides? Where are the rules? Are they different for different classes, schools, Cities, States? Who decides?
************
The number #1 Question is: “What are we trying to accomplish..really!”
Query: Where are we going to get “precise”, “definitive”, “mutually understandable” answers?
May I propose some possible alternatives……
1. Before we can approach any solution to any problem, we must have a precise idea of what we want to accomplish. We need a written plan. If we can’t get a written plan, send your child to a “For Profit Private school”. They have already answered these questions. There is little hope for improvement (notice I didn’t say “change”!) without a written plan for Public Education! The written plan must be precise, definitive, and mutually understandable. Change can be good or bad! (the “new” math?)
2. Success must be measurable!! How can you know if you are not improving unless you have a measurement of some kind. There can be no student “effect” because of the measurement. The measurement must be a “management tool” only …i.e. improve, the same, or, failing.
3. We should try to establish a “Basic Education” curriculum for each student’s years work. This Basic curriculum should be very restricted.
The “Basic Education” should include:
a. The teaching of the English language. This is the language of the United States of America. It is our national language. It is the language of the majority of the jobs and businesses of this country. Success comes from being able to communicate with the greatest segment of the people. If you believe that each ethnic group can have it’s own language, customs and value systems, then you believe in a different United States than the founders did. If you want a change in the essence of this country, in the beliefs and customs of this country, that is what will happen if we try to have more than one major, “official” language. You will have an “American Europe”…..separate groups with different customs, languages, and value systems. You will not have “The United States” as we know it!
b. As part of the teaching of the English language you must include the basics of “reading and writing”.(This is will be based on a “sliding scale” of the evaluation and measurement of the skill level that should be expected at a certain age or class level.) There is no other way we transfer information, directions, instructions, etc. other than through language.
c. Mathematics skills must include (again on this “sliding scale”) the eventual ability to do simple tasks that may be required to have a checkbook, a savings account, purchase and correctly pay for goods and services, buy a house or a car, borrow money, and in general understand “money” transactions. Simple Algebra may be slightly included as a method of problem solving. There is a very evident picture in Mathematics of the concepts of “neat, orderly, logical, reasonable, predictable and measurable”. There should be enough exposure to Math to the extent that these concepts are exposed in the “Basic Curriculum”.
d. We should teach the concepts and information necessary to encourage personal hygiene and personal health. Sex education is “tricky”. When to start, what to teach; how much is necessary and for what age; for what specific purpose do you need to know what; etc.…..???.... At the very least, at some points, the “consequences” of the “sex act” must be exposed!
(If a parent objects, should they be given the right to exclude their child from this exposure? Part of the requirements to receive welfare should be, whether or not, the student was restricted from sex education. A student must be provided with the information as to the “consequences”! Certain details are not necessary; but teaching “consequences” is necessary.)
e. We must include information as to what “The United States” is. What it stands for according to the constitution. What Democracy is and what the alternatives are. How we became “The United States”. We must give enough information that everyone will know what is involved in being a citizen of “The United States”. How about giving everyone a “citizen’s test” until they pass it! It’s measurable! Students must know why it’s so valuable and why people have died for it! Why is it so different than most other countries? Why do people from all over the world want to come here and become “citizens”? What are some of the criticisms and what the answers are to those that criticize. No! Not politics!….. Just pure “patriotism”! Just understanding America. If they don’t get it in school, from where will the information come?
f. Now !!… What to do with the unmotivated, malcontents and the “violent”. How about “Special Basic curriculum schools”. You are measured and can always graduate back into a “Regular Basic School”. This “Special School” will have more security and more enforcement of attendance. And, the student’s participation “regardless of measurable achievement in the “Basics” will end at a predetermined age! If you are one of the above described, you will no longer hold back the effectiveness of the teaching in the “Normal Basic School” but will be sent to this “Special Basic School”!
g. So far we have been talking about a “basic” curriculum scaled to the performance level expected at a certain time. If a student achieves a certain “measurable” performance in the “Basic” curriculum he can choose to add other “non-Basic” subjects to his “education”. This additional subject material may be taught at another building, a sort of “Magnet School”.
But first and foremost, a student must have achieved a satisfactory, measured performance in his “Basic” courses. …That comes first…. Every time!!! Then the additional courses in Science, Physics, the Arts, Athletics, etc. are available….. BUT, first things first!!!
******************
I. This principle of a “Basic Curriculum” must be discussed and accepted. Accepted by the group that eventually will be selected to accept any “principle” (i.e. the Government’s, State’s City’s, etc…)
II. The matter of the “money”…. The who, where, and how must also be solved.
III. The principle of “measurement” is a management tool. It is a tool to view the success or failure of a student’s performance in achieving a fixed level of “Basic” understanding. It must also be accepted and acted upon. Again …no student is affected by the measurement other than being required to retake the course until his measurement is acceptable for his level. … no “non-basic” courses added until the acceptable, measurable level is achieved! No stigma, no loss of self esteem, no going backwards … just a retake of the “Basic” that is not at an acceptable level.
IV. The principle of “Basic curriculum” achievement before being able to select “enhanced curriculum” must also be accepted and enacted upon.
V. The idea of a “Special Basic Curriculum school building” for the malcontents, the unmotivated and the “violent” must also be accepted and acted upon.
******************
As a matter of personal principle, I would not end with only a criticism. We all know we have a monumental failure on our hands. I have presented some “alternatives” for discussion. Perhaps you, too, have “successful alternatives”. .……….Yeah! … But to whom are we going to talk ??
Unfortunately, the fundamental question remains….
“How do you make a change?”
But exactly what is "Education”?
It’s a lot of money but what are we spending it on??
Question: Are we trying to just pass on “facts”?
Query: We only have to buy an Encyclopedia for facts; or, go to the new internet for more facts.
**************
Question: Are we trying to be a “family” for students?
Query: If so, what do we try to teach as foster mothers and fathers? From where do the teachers come?... Who trains the teachers?
**************
Question: Are we trying to teach “self respect”, “self esteem”, “confidence”, or what?
Query: How do you do that? What do these words mean? Who gave the instructions? Who trained the teachers? Who decided to do that? What are their credentials?
***************
Question: Are we trying to “baby sit” for the day so parents can earn money?
Query: What kind of services and atmosphere should you provide? Who is going to make the rules? Who delegated them to make the rules? What are their credentials?
**************
Question: Is this a Government , State, City or Community matter?
Query: Who decides? What are their credentials? On what is the decision based?
**************
Question: Who gets the money? How much? From where does it come? Who decides?
Query: Is it dollars per student? Is there a special category of student? (i.e. Rich, Poor, Ethnic, Inner-city, etc.) Who decides on the criteria? Who delegated them to decide? What are their credentials?
***************
Question: Are we trying to teach students so they can get a job?
Query: What kind of a job? Who decides? What special type of training for what special type of job? How many “special jobs” are there? … What is a “trade school” for?… Is there a difference?… So!… what’s the difference?
***************
Question: What do we do for the malcontents, unmotivated, slow learners and the “violent”?
Query: Do we keep the class environment to the level of the lowest achievers? Do we spend whatever time is necessary to get a quiet, disciplined learning environment? How much time should that take from the class period? Who decides? Where are the rules? Are they different for different classes, schools, Cities, States? Who decides?
************
The number #1 Question is: “What are we trying to accomplish..really!”
Query: Where are we going to get “precise”, “definitive”, “mutually understandable” answers?
May I propose some possible alternatives……
1. Before we can approach any solution to any problem, we must have a precise idea of what we want to accomplish. We need a written plan. If we can’t get a written plan, send your child to a “For Profit Private school”. They have already answered these questions. There is little hope for improvement (notice I didn’t say “change”!) without a written plan for Public Education! The written plan must be precise, definitive, and mutually understandable. Change can be good or bad! (the “new” math?)
2. Success must be measurable!! How can you know if you are not improving unless you have a measurement of some kind. There can be no student “effect” because of the measurement. The measurement must be a “management tool” only …i.e. improve, the same, or, failing.
3. We should try to establish a “Basic Education” curriculum for each student’s years work. This Basic curriculum should be very restricted.
The “Basic Education” should include:
a. The teaching of the English language. This is the language of the United States of America. It is our national language. It is the language of the majority of the jobs and businesses of this country. Success comes from being able to communicate with the greatest segment of the people. If you believe that each ethnic group can have it’s own language, customs and value systems, then you believe in a different United States than the founders did. If you want a change in the essence of this country, in the beliefs and customs of this country, that is what will happen if we try to have more than one major, “official” language. You will have an “American Europe”…..separate groups with different customs, languages, and value systems. You will not have “The United States” as we know it!
b. As part of the teaching of the English language you must include the basics of “reading and writing”.(This is will be based on a “sliding scale” of the evaluation and measurement of the skill level that should be expected at a certain age or class level.) There is no other way we transfer information, directions, instructions, etc. other than through language.
c. Mathematics skills must include (again on this “sliding scale”) the eventual ability to do simple tasks that may be required to have a checkbook, a savings account, purchase and correctly pay for goods and services, buy a house or a car, borrow money, and in general understand “money” transactions. Simple Algebra may be slightly included as a method of problem solving. There is a very evident picture in Mathematics of the concepts of “neat, orderly, logical, reasonable, predictable and measurable”. There should be enough exposure to Math to the extent that these concepts are exposed in the “Basic Curriculum”.
d. We should teach the concepts and information necessary to encourage personal hygiene and personal health. Sex education is “tricky”. When to start, what to teach; how much is necessary and for what age; for what specific purpose do you need to know what; etc.…..???.... At the very least, at some points, the “consequences” of the “sex act” must be exposed!
(If a parent objects, should they be given the right to exclude their child from this exposure? Part of the requirements to receive welfare should be, whether or not, the student was restricted from sex education. A student must be provided with the information as to the “consequences”! Certain details are not necessary; but teaching “consequences” is necessary.)
e. We must include information as to what “The United States” is. What it stands for according to the constitution. What Democracy is and what the alternatives are. How we became “The United States”. We must give enough information that everyone will know what is involved in being a citizen of “The United States”. How about giving everyone a “citizen’s test” until they pass it! It’s measurable! Students must know why it’s so valuable and why people have died for it! Why is it so different than most other countries? Why do people from all over the world want to come here and become “citizens”? What are some of the criticisms and what the answers are to those that criticize. No! Not politics!….. Just pure “patriotism”! Just understanding America. If they don’t get it in school, from where will the information come?
f. Now !!… What to do with the unmotivated, malcontents and the “violent”. How about “Special Basic curriculum schools”. You are measured and can always graduate back into a “Regular Basic School”. This “Special School” will have more security and more enforcement of attendance. And, the student’s participation “regardless of measurable achievement in the “Basics” will end at a predetermined age! If you are one of the above described, you will no longer hold back the effectiveness of the teaching in the “Normal Basic School” but will be sent to this “Special Basic School”!
g. So far we have been talking about a “basic” curriculum scaled to the performance level expected at a certain time. If a student achieves a certain “measurable” performance in the “Basic” curriculum he can choose to add other “non-Basic” subjects to his “education”. This additional subject material may be taught at another building, a sort of “Magnet School”.
But first and foremost, a student must have achieved a satisfactory, measured performance in his “Basic” courses. …That comes first…. Every time!!! Then the additional courses in Science, Physics, the Arts, Athletics, etc. are available….. BUT, first things first!!!
******************
I. This principle of a “Basic Curriculum” must be discussed and accepted. Accepted by the group that eventually will be selected to accept any “principle” (i.e. the Government’s, State’s City’s, etc…)
II. The matter of the “money”…. The who, where, and how must also be solved.
III. The principle of “measurement” is a management tool. It is a tool to view the success or failure of a student’s performance in achieving a fixed level of “Basic” understanding. It must also be accepted and acted upon. Again …no student is affected by the measurement other than being required to retake the course until his measurement is acceptable for his level. … no “non-basic” courses added until the acceptable, measurable level is achieved! No stigma, no loss of self esteem, no going backwards … just a retake of the “Basic” that is not at an acceptable level.
IV. The principle of “Basic curriculum” achievement before being able to select “enhanced curriculum” must also be accepted and enacted upon.
V. The idea of a “Special Basic Curriculum school building” for the malcontents, the unmotivated and the “violent” must also be accepted and acted upon.
******************
As a matter of personal principle, I would not end with only a criticism. We all know we have a monumental failure on our hands. I have presented some “alternatives” for discussion. Perhaps you, too, have “successful alternatives”. .……….Yeah! … But to whom are we going to talk ??
Unfortunately, the fundamental question remains….
“How do you make a change?”
Friday, February 15, 2008
Family - #401 - #09 – Responsibility” takes “Kohanas”!
Are you man enough to take “Responsibility”?
What’s the difference between “commitment” and “responsibility”?
If you are “responsible” for something are you as “committed to action” as if you were merely “responsible” for it?
Does being “responsible” for something require action?
If it “doesn’t” happen are you held “accountable” for it? Are you also “responsible” for it?
Is there a difference?
In fact, if you are “committed” to it, are you held “responsible” for it ? Are you also held “accountable for it?
What’s the difference? Are they all the same?
How can you hold someone “responsible” if you don’t know what YOU mean much less them knowing what you mean!!!
Could the word “responsible” be a general term which includes “commitment and accountability”!!!
Would you be better to tell someone specifically what you mean by…”commitment and/or accountability”?
Does the admonishing i.e. “Be responsible”, or, “ I’m holding you responsible” really mean anything? Could this just be noise…. intimidating or warning noise? Does the other party know what you expect from them? Can’t you be more specific?
Is it any wonder that “Being responsible for your own actions” doesn’t really mean anything?
Is it any wonder that people being admonished don’t pay much attention?
Like any other successful oral or written communication, the words used must have a mutual meaning to BOTH sides to be effective. Can’t you express yourself more exactly, in a more defined way? Can’t you say exactly, or at least more completely, what you mean? Don’t you think you will get a better result from being more precise?
The least you can do is to “define” what you mean by the term you used. How it is to be accomplished; and, how it is to be measured for success; and, what’s the penalty for failure!!
What’s the difference between “commitment” and “responsibility”?
If you are “responsible” for something are you as “committed to action” as if you were merely “responsible” for it?
Does being “responsible” for something require action?
If it “doesn’t” happen are you held “accountable” for it? Are you also “responsible” for it?
Is there a difference?
In fact, if you are “committed” to it, are you held “responsible” for it ? Are you also held “accountable for it?
What’s the difference? Are they all the same?
How can you hold someone “responsible” if you don’t know what YOU mean much less them knowing what you mean!!!
Could the word “responsible” be a general term which includes “commitment and accountability”!!!
Would you be better to tell someone specifically what you mean by…”commitment and/or accountability”?
Does the admonishing i.e. “Be responsible”, or, “ I’m holding you responsible” really mean anything? Could this just be noise…. intimidating or warning noise? Does the other party know what you expect from them? Can’t you be more specific?
Is it any wonder that “Being responsible for your own actions” doesn’t really mean anything?
Is it any wonder that people being admonished don’t pay much attention?
Like any other successful oral or written communication, the words used must have a mutual meaning to BOTH sides to be effective. Can’t you express yourself more exactly, in a more defined way? Can’t you say exactly, or at least more completely, what you mean? Don’t you think you will get a better result from being more precise?
The least you can do is to “define” what you mean by the term you used. How it is to be accomplished; and, how it is to be measured for success; and, what’s the penalty for failure!!
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Family - #401 - #08 – The shortcut to “Self esteem” and “Confidence”!
Do these words sound familiar?
What do they mean? What’s the difference? How do you get “them”?
Let’s start with a definition……..
“Self esteem” is supposed to be what YOU think about “yourself”!! Are you valuable? Are you as good as anybody else? Are you entitled to respect?
“Confidence” may imply that “you” think “you” can accomplish any thing you put your mind too! In essence, you can “do”…….
The main difference is between “you are” and “you can do”.
Here are some interesting questions:
1. Since “you” measure both things, what qualifies “you” to judge yourself?
2. Where do you find a “measuring stick” since it is all about “you”?
3. Do you compare yourself with “anybody, or, thing” to find something to measure against (compare)?
4. How will “you” determine if you have a “right answer, a right measure”?
5. What if your “measure” is solely based on what “you” think, what your “un-compared measure” is?
6. Could it be that an “un-compared result” has no real validity? … no real value!!!
7. Worse yet…. Could it be that you could rely on something that is, in truth, wrong!!!
In addition to this bleak prospect, “How do you teach this?”
Why would you even try?
Why would you attempt to give someone something that was going to be based solely on their “own opinion”? …..An opinion without comparison, measure, or validity?
Wouldn’t it be easy, under these circumstances, to give someone a false sense of “self esteem” or a false sense of a reason to be “confident”?
Indeed, couldn’t this be very harmful! Couldn’t this lead to further loss of whatever good feelings someone had about himself, when a situation arose where a comparison was unavoidable! Suppose you acted with “confidence” and had no real-world reason to be “confident”? Disaster might be right around the corner!! What a frustration, what a disappointment!! But you wouldn’t know why!!! That’s the real harm!!
Why would you even teach this?
***************************************
Wouldn’t it be better to teach people what “gives” you a feeling of “self esteem” …what “gives” you a feeling of “confidence”?
What do they mean? What’s the difference? How do you get “them”?
Let’s start with a definition……..
“Self esteem” is supposed to be what YOU think about “yourself”!! Are you valuable? Are you as good as anybody else? Are you entitled to respect?
“Confidence” may imply that “you” think “you” can accomplish any thing you put your mind too! In essence, you can “do”…….
The main difference is between “you are” and “you can do”.
Here are some interesting questions:
1. Since “you” measure both things, what qualifies “you” to judge yourself?
2. Where do you find a “measuring stick” since it is all about “you”?
3. Do you compare yourself with “anybody, or, thing” to find something to measure against (compare)?
4. How will “you” determine if you have a “right answer, a right measure”?
5. What if your “measure” is solely based on what “you” think, what your “un-compared measure” is?
6. Could it be that an “un-compared result” has no real validity? … no real value!!!
7. Worse yet…. Could it be that you could rely on something that is, in truth, wrong!!!
In addition to this bleak prospect, “How do you teach this?”
Why would you even try?
Why would you attempt to give someone something that was going to be based solely on their “own opinion”? …..An opinion without comparison, measure, or validity?
Wouldn’t it be easy, under these circumstances, to give someone a false sense of “self esteem” or a false sense of a reason to be “confident”?
Indeed, couldn’t this be very harmful! Couldn’t this lead to further loss of whatever good feelings someone had about himself, when a situation arose where a comparison was unavoidable! Suppose you acted with “confidence” and had no real-world reason to be “confident”? Disaster might be right around the corner!! What a frustration, what a disappointment!! But you wouldn’t know why!!! That’s the real harm!!
Why would you even teach this?
***************************************
Wouldn’t it be better to teach people what “gives” you a feeling of “self esteem” …what “gives” you a feeling of “confidence”?
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Personal - #64 – Does Obama attract a special audience?
Do "Squabblers", "Arm Wavers", and "Screamers" elect candidates?
You provide an event, they come!
Anything that’s a rally or demonstration, they come!
There is automatic “celebrity” attention!
They depend on “others” to create events to go to. (They have no plans of their own!)
It is not a “matter of approval” …. It’s a matter of activity! … (Remember, they have no plans of their own!)
What do screams and the waving of arms denote?
They denote that "they are there"! They denote whatever is on their mind at the time. They denote “celebrity” recognition. They denote the “general” recognition of whatever the subject is of the demonstration !
There is no serious effort to understand, no serious effort to find a “successful alternative”! …(just screams and a waving of arms)
To draw any conclusions from this array of emotions is to draw a wrong “conclusion”. This is raw emotion, nothing more!
Does American policy come from these events?
Who attends these events other than the paid followers? (Is this a young versus older issue?)
Are we now at an impasse where the intellectual power is opposed to the rhetorical “change” crowd? Is the rhetoric of change without “audit”, without the “money”, without the “future” and without the present “strength of the national economy”. Little is said about what to do. Much is said about “more” and “better”!... “more” diplomacy, “better” economy!... (Ugh!)
Nowhere is “How do you do it?”!
The older generation has had a chance to see some really “bad” people. People who you couldn’t talk to. People you couldn’t reason with. People who recognized pure rhetoric for what it is… (a paper tiger!) But the younger generation has the ideas that you can talk to anyone! Anyone can change!
The older generation has seen all this before!
The younger generation hasn’t had the time on the earth to experience this! The younger generation thinks that rhetoric and reason will talk their way out of it!... “Experience” versus “Rhetoric”, “Change” versus Experience, “Bad” people versus people from our own environment…..
These are the things that the “older” generation has seen before!
That is to say, that what we presently have is perfect!
On the contrary….the older generation says that the alternative (more undefined “change” and more “rhetoric”) will NOT bring America to its perfection but it is the better of two ideas.
This is the root question! ….. This is what the election is all about!!
You provide an event, they come!
Anything that’s a rally or demonstration, they come!
There is automatic “celebrity” attention!
They depend on “others” to create events to go to. (They have no plans of their own!)
It is not a “matter of approval” …. It’s a matter of activity! … (Remember, they have no plans of their own!)
What do screams and the waving of arms denote?
They denote that "they are there"! They denote whatever is on their mind at the time. They denote “celebrity” recognition. They denote the “general” recognition of whatever the subject is of the demonstration !
There is no serious effort to understand, no serious effort to find a “successful alternative”! …(just screams and a waving of arms)
To draw any conclusions from this array of emotions is to draw a wrong “conclusion”. This is raw emotion, nothing more!
Does American policy come from these events?
Who attends these events other than the paid followers? (Is this a young versus older issue?)
Are we now at an impasse where the intellectual power is opposed to the rhetorical “change” crowd? Is the rhetoric of change without “audit”, without the “money”, without the “future” and without the present “strength of the national economy”. Little is said about what to do. Much is said about “more” and “better”!... “more” diplomacy, “better” economy!... (Ugh!)
Nowhere is “How do you do it?”!
The older generation has had a chance to see some really “bad” people. People who you couldn’t talk to. People you couldn’t reason with. People who recognized pure rhetoric for what it is… (a paper tiger!) But the younger generation has the ideas that you can talk to anyone! Anyone can change!
The older generation has seen all this before!
The younger generation hasn’t had the time on the earth to experience this! The younger generation thinks that rhetoric and reason will talk their way out of it!... “Experience” versus “Rhetoric”, “Change” versus Experience, “Bad” people versus people from our own environment…..
These are the things that the “older” generation has seen before!
That is to say, that what we presently have is perfect!
On the contrary….the older generation says that the alternative (more undefined “change” and more “rhetoric”) will NOT bring America to its perfection but it is the better of two ideas.
This is the root question! ….. This is what the election is all about!!
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Family - #401 - #06 – Undisciplined “mating” versus “Responsible” parenthood
(versus a “year long mating season”!)
Even the most ignorant animals have a certain “mating” period. Perhaps the “human animal” is the only one in the kingdom that seems to have a year-long mating season. Naturally there are results!!
“Parenthood” indicates that mating has brought about “natural results” .… “babies” or “children”.
What are the “responsibilities” of the parents?
Do the “parents” feel any responsibility for this “result”?
Did the parents “envision” this result in the beginning? If not, why not?
Does this “biological act” require “thought” before..?
I guess, like most everything else, it’s a matter of where you come from. Too bad!… The results seem permanent!
From “where” are the answers to these questions supposed to come?
“Who” is responsible for seeing that the information is available?
“To whom” is the information available? …. “Who” decides?
How much information is adequate? … “Who” decides?
I guess, like most everything else, it’s a matter of where you come from. Too bad!… The results seem permanent!
And just suppose you don’t care!!!
Suppose you’re not interested?
Then what???
Who pays for what?
What are the consequences….. cheap labor … temporary enjoyment … the family name … etc.?
(I guess, like most everything else, it’s a matter of where you come from…. Too bad!… The results seem permanent!)
Somebody better pay attention to answering these questions! The results of “no discussion” is worldwide problems. Hunger, violence, terror, disrespect, love, happiness, and more are the results of a “no discussion” policy. This is too difficult a subject, this is too contentious, this is too awkward, this is too politically incorrect not to “discuss”!
One can, at the very least, discuss these questions with the persons who are nearest to you. Avoiding these conversations insures a poor outcome! And what if these “discussions’ are not heeded to? Well, at least you can say “I contributed as best as I could”. However, there is no excuse for not “trying”! Sure there will be different views. But not having “any” views is a sin!
Should I be concerned with those that have a completely different view of the answers to these many questions. As long as their views don’t affect the results to my existence I guess I have “no say”. But when I am affected …. I certainly can express myself!
I can offer my support or reject my support. If I am affected, I can even fight for my views. But “first” I must define and understand what my views are and what the other parties’ views are. If there is no understanding, there can be no successful accommodation!
So what do you say to your teenagers? …. Your students? ….Your “babies”?
This written conversation would be a good place to start!! …..What do you think is important?
Even the most ignorant animals have a certain “mating” period. Perhaps the “human animal” is the only one in the kingdom that seems to have a year-long mating season. Naturally there are results!!
“Parenthood” indicates that mating has brought about “natural results” .… “babies” or “children”.
What are the “responsibilities” of the parents?
Do the “parents” feel any responsibility for this “result”?
Did the parents “envision” this result in the beginning? If not, why not?
Does this “biological act” require “thought” before..?
I guess, like most everything else, it’s a matter of where you come from. Too bad!… The results seem permanent!
From “where” are the answers to these questions supposed to come?
“Who” is responsible for seeing that the information is available?
“To whom” is the information available? …. “Who” decides?
How much information is adequate? … “Who” decides?
I guess, like most everything else, it’s a matter of where you come from. Too bad!… The results seem permanent!
And just suppose you don’t care!!!
Suppose you’re not interested?
Then what???
Who pays for what?
What are the consequences….. cheap labor … temporary enjoyment … the family name … etc.?
(I guess, like most everything else, it’s a matter of where you come from…. Too bad!… The results seem permanent!)
Somebody better pay attention to answering these questions! The results of “no discussion” is worldwide problems. Hunger, violence, terror, disrespect, love, happiness, and more are the results of a “no discussion” policy. This is too difficult a subject, this is too contentious, this is too awkward, this is too politically incorrect not to “discuss”!
One can, at the very least, discuss these questions with the persons who are nearest to you. Avoiding these conversations insures a poor outcome! And what if these “discussions’ are not heeded to? Well, at least you can say “I contributed as best as I could”. However, there is no excuse for not “trying”! Sure there will be different views. But not having “any” views is a sin!
Should I be concerned with those that have a completely different view of the answers to these many questions. As long as their views don’t affect the results to my existence I guess I have “no say”. But when I am affected …. I certainly can express myself!
I can offer my support or reject my support. If I am affected, I can even fight for my views. But “first” I must define and understand what my views are and what the other parties’ views are. If there is no understanding, there can be no successful accommodation!
So what do you say to your teenagers? …. Your students? ….Your “babies”?
This written conversation would be a good place to start!! …..What do you think is important?
Friday, February 8, 2008
Family - #401 - #05 - What’s a “marriage”?.... (Mr. and Mrs. say “I do”
What’s a “value system”?.... (Marry your values!)
These two subjects are intertwined!….. One should not exist without the other!!
“Marriage” (a “legal marriage” with a “legal” certificate, et al) could be:
1. The “public” acknowledgement of a legal arrangement called “marriage”. It is the desire of two people to state publicly that they have chosen each other, in the light of all, to be legally “married”.
2. Could be that “they” have a “mutual understanding” of what each expects from the state of “marriage”. You see, this definition includes a “mutual understanding”. Words and ideas should have been exchanged. Both parties should have taken the time, to the best of “their” ability, to define, to communicate, to share and exchange views as to what each would like to expect of the other. This is not so simple; but, “Is there a successful alternative”?
3. Could be that they share a mutual experience of communication and understanding “BEFORE” they agree to exchange legal vows.
4. But what of the future? What about the unknown? What about the experiences that neither have shared before? How do you successfully discuss these? The experience of sharing and discussing the things that you, both, know now should be an indication of how you approach the future unknown circumstances. Can you talk to each other? Can you successfully communicate? Are you successful in “understanding” each other? Can you successfully “disagree”? Can you successfully “work out” differences?
5. Are you ready, now, to become legally “married”?
But there is another way!
Suppose you just get “married” and hope things “will turn out”? It could be successful, or, it could be a failure. You could find out that there are meaningful and important differences that you, seemingly, can’t “work out”? What’s the price to you? Not necessarily money, but how about your own feelings? Is this step too important or too “valuable” to you to take a chance?
What’s your “value system”!!!
What’s a “value system”? …What decides the “value” you place on things? … When do you get a “value system”? … Does your value system change? … What good is a “value system” if it changes?
Let’s start at a definition………
A personal “value system” is:
1. A series of ideas that you, yourself, understand. They have been articulated to yourself in such a way that you feel you understand what you mean!
2. Each idea has a priority …a “value”.
3. Each idea has a position of order in your “value system”.
4. You have chosen your most “valuable”.
5. You have decided that there are “values” you must have … “ can’t live without” values.
6. You have also decided on what you might “sacrifice” and what’s not so important but would be “nice” to have.
That’s a “value system”. But, it too should change as you become more aware of yourself …as you get to know more about yourself … as more experiences enter your life. But you should start somewhere! Having not thought about a “value system”, having overlooked the necessity of one, may leave you vulnerable to all types of disappointments and misunderstandings. But, you might get “lucky”! Want to take the chance?
It’s the “value system” that helps direct your choices, your ideas of morals, of ethics, of your conduct in society. What would you expect from someone who has little or no “value system”? You will probably have a two legged, human animal who lives on “reflexes” … no logic, no reason, just reflexes! Would you expect much “sharing” (which requires an understanding of another … or, just the plain capacity to “understand”) Would you expect much “reasoned thought”? Where would the choice of “something important” come from? From where would the “value” of “important” come? Is it a matter of just “pure reflex”! … important or useless, now …. in this moment … no thought, no logic, just “reflex”!
Sounds pretty dangerous to me!
So what has this to do with “marriage” … legal, certified “marriage … successful “marriage”?
How are you going to give yourselves the best “odds” on having a lasting and “mutually valuable” married experience? How can you best achieve this goal? Are the “odds’ in your favor if each of you don’t have a “value system” to exchange and discuss? Suppose you can’t talk about it? Suppose your communication skills are weak? Suppose, suppose …!! … How good do you think your chances are?
But then again…Let’s take a chance!! …Who knows? Everything might “work out” just fine! It’s a choice you always have. Are the odds in your favor?
Once each of you know and agree on what you expect from each other, the odds are more in your favor. Not everyone wants or needs to expect the same thing from this experience. As long as you both understand and agree on what to expect, the odds are very much in your favor.
But “marriage” doesn’t bring something to each other, it merely confirms what you both already feel!!
I hope you had a friend first. Then, you decided to publicly “confirm” this special relationship!!
These two subjects are intertwined!….. One should not exist without the other!!
“Marriage” (a “legal marriage” with a “legal” certificate, et al) could be:
1. The “public” acknowledgement of a legal arrangement called “marriage”. It is the desire of two people to state publicly that they have chosen each other, in the light of all, to be legally “married”.
2. Could be that “they” have a “mutual understanding” of what each expects from the state of “marriage”. You see, this definition includes a “mutual understanding”. Words and ideas should have been exchanged. Both parties should have taken the time, to the best of “their” ability, to define, to communicate, to share and exchange views as to what each would like to expect of the other. This is not so simple; but, “Is there a successful alternative”?
3. Could be that they share a mutual experience of communication and understanding “BEFORE” they agree to exchange legal vows.
4. But what of the future? What about the unknown? What about the experiences that neither have shared before? How do you successfully discuss these? The experience of sharing and discussing the things that you, both, know now should be an indication of how you approach the future unknown circumstances. Can you talk to each other? Can you successfully communicate? Are you successful in “understanding” each other? Can you successfully “disagree”? Can you successfully “work out” differences?
5. Are you ready, now, to become legally “married”?
But there is another way!
Suppose you just get “married” and hope things “will turn out”? It could be successful, or, it could be a failure. You could find out that there are meaningful and important differences that you, seemingly, can’t “work out”? What’s the price to you? Not necessarily money, but how about your own feelings? Is this step too important or too “valuable” to you to take a chance?
What’s your “value system”!!!
What’s a “value system”? …What decides the “value” you place on things? … When do you get a “value system”? … Does your value system change? … What good is a “value system” if it changes?
Let’s start at a definition………
A personal “value system” is:
1. A series of ideas that you, yourself, understand. They have been articulated to yourself in such a way that you feel you understand what you mean!
2. Each idea has a priority …a “value”.
3. Each idea has a position of order in your “value system”.
4. You have chosen your most “valuable”.
5. You have decided that there are “values” you must have … “ can’t live without” values.
6. You have also decided on what you might “sacrifice” and what’s not so important but would be “nice” to have.
That’s a “value system”. But, it too should change as you become more aware of yourself …as you get to know more about yourself … as more experiences enter your life. But you should start somewhere! Having not thought about a “value system”, having overlooked the necessity of one, may leave you vulnerable to all types of disappointments and misunderstandings. But, you might get “lucky”! Want to take the chance?
It’s the “value system” that helps direct your choices, your ideas of morals, of ethics, of your conduct in society. What would you expect from someone who has little or no “value system”? You will probably have a two legged, human animal who lives on “reflexes” … no logic, no reason, just reflexes! Would you expect much “sharing” (which requires an understanding of another … or, just the plain capacity to “understand”) Would you expect much “reasoned thought”? Where would the choice of “something important” come from? From where would the “value” of “important” come? Is it a matter of just “pure reflex”! … important or useless, now …. in this moment … no thought, no logic, just “reflex”!
Sounds pretty dangerous to me!
So what has this to do with “marriage” … legal, certified “marriage … successful “marriage”?
How are you going to give yourselves the best “odds” on having a lasting and “mutually valuable” married experience? How can you best achieve this goal? Are the “odds’ in your favor if each of you don’t have a “value system” to exchange and discuss? Suppose you can’t talk about it? Suppose your communication skills are weak? Suppose, suppose …!! … How good do you think your chances are?
But then again…Let’s take a chance!! …Who knows? Everything might “work out” just fine! It’s a choice you always have. Are the odds in your favor?
Once each of you know and agree on what you expect from each other, the odds are more in your favor. Not everyone wants or needs to expect the same thing from this experience. As long as you both understand and agree on what to expect, the odds are very much in your favor.
But “marriage” doesn’t bring something to each other, it merely confirms what you both already feel!!
I hope you had a friend first. Then, you decided to publicly “confirm” this special relationship!!
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Family - #401 - 04 - Does blood make a “family?”
Sounds real simple, doesn’t it?
Well …..let’s take “family” for instance.
*******************
Question: Is a family “blood related”?
Query: Does it have to be? Could your family be unrelated by “blood”? Could your group or gang be “family” to you? Could your community be family to you?
*******************
Question: What does “family” mean? How is it “defined”? Do you accept the “definition”? Who “defined” family, anyway?
Query: What does family mean to you? What are its values to you? Is “your” family permanent to you?
*******************
Question: What makes a “family”? How many people? What kind of people?
Query: Do you include relatives, old people, young people, males, females, criminals, educated, uneducated, employed, unemployed, rich, poor…. or what?
*******************
Question: How do “family” differ from “friends”?
Query: Are all your family “friends”?…. Are all your friends “family”?…. What’s the difference?
********************
So you thought, at first, that this was easy?
********************
May I try to define “family”?.... (Can you chose what “blood” belongs to your “family”?)
“Family” should include considerations of the following:
a. People I think I want as “family”.
b. People I judge to be of special, lifelong value to me.
c. People whom I respect for at least something …. education, confidence, loyalty, companionship …… at least something that I value highly. (I better have a good idea of what I value highly before I accept or want to include them in my “family”!)
d. People whose “long term” presence gives me something rare and important to me. (note: “long term”!!!)
e. People of “any sort or type or background” that fill these attributes.
f. I would like to believe that the “family”,I have chosen,feels the same way about me that I do about them.
g. I hope my “family” will help guide and support me in my efforts. I hope they will feel free to constructively criticize my efforts. I hope they will feel free to disagree with me, in hopes that I might gain another point of view so I can make a better decision.
h. I sincerely hope that I know the difference between a “new acquaintance” and “my family”. (If I choose well, my new acquaintance may become “family” in a while.)
(There is obviously a vast difference between a “family” and a “litter”…. Ugh!)
Do you think you are better qualified now to choose your “family” having considered this definition? Do you think now that "blood" makes a family?
*******************
Well …..let’s take “family” for instance.
*******************
Question: Is a family “blood related”?
Query: Does it have to be? Could your family be unrelated by “blood”? Could your group or gang be “family” to you? Could your community be family to you?
*******************
Question: What does “family” mean? How is it “defined”? Do you accept the “definition”? Who “defined” family, anyway?
Query: What does family mean to you? What are its values to you? Is “your” family permanent to you?
*******************
Question: What makes a “family”? How many people? What kind of people?
Query: Do you include relatives, old people, young people, males, females, criminals, educated, uneducated, employed, unemployed, rich, poor…. or what?
*******************
Question: How do “family” differ from “friends”?
Query: Are all your family “friends”?…. Are all your friends “family”?…. What’s the difference?
********************
So you thought, at first, that this was easy?
********************
May I try to define “family”?.... (Can you chose what “blood” belongs to your “family”?)
“Family” should include considerations of the following:
a. People I think I want as “family”.
b. People I judge to be of special, lifelong value to me.
c. People whom I respect for at least something …. education, confidence, loyalty, companionship …… at least something that I value highly. (I better have a good idea of what I value highly before I accept or want to include them in my “family”!)
d. People whose “long term” presence gives me something rare and important to me. (note: “long term”!!!)
e. People of “any sort or type or background” that fill these attributes.
f. I would like to believe that the “family”,I have chosen,feels the same way about me that I do about them.
g. I hope my “family” will help guide and support me in my efforts. I hope they will feel free to constructively criticize my efforts. I hope they will feel free to disagree with me, in hopes that I might gain another point of view so I can make a better decision.
h. I sincerely hope that I know the difference between a “new acquaintance” and “my family”. (If I choose well, my new acquaintance may become “family” in a while.)
(There is obviously a vast difference between a “family” and a “litter”…. Ugh!)
Do you think you are better qualified now to choose your “family” having considered this definition? Do you think now that "blood" makes a family?
*******************
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Definition - #301 - #57 - What’s this new interest called “GREED”!
“Greed” can be bad! ….or,… “Greed” can be good!
Which one do you chose?....Or, do you have to chose only one?
“Greed” is bad if it is only done when it hurts people or is at the expense of people.
“Greed” is bad if it is done for its own sake. (…to be greedy)
“Greed” is bad if it represents a policy without limitations.
“Greed” is good if it’s done where the people participate
“Greed” is good if it’s done where the people and the corporations benefit.
“Greed” is good if it’s only one faction of a policy.
“Greed” is bad when it wants to acquire more “without limitations”.
“Greed” is good when it wants to acquire only what it needs now and in the near future.
So, you see, that “greed” can be an asset or a liability.
Why this interest now?
Because “greed” is seldom debated in a total.
“Greed” signifies “bad”. Seldom do the people see “greed” as something, sometimes “good”!
In light of this article, can you now have a resonable discussion of “greed”?
Which one do you chose?....Or, do you have to chose only one?
“Greed” is bad if it is only done when it hurts people or is at the expense of people.
“Greed” is bad if it is done for its own sake. (…to be greedy)
“Greed” is bad if it represents a policy without limitations.
“Greed” is good if it’s done where the people participate
“Greed” is good if it’s done where the people and the corporations benefit.
“Greed” is good if it’s only one faction of a policy.
“Greed” is bad when it wants to acquire more “without limitations”.
“Greed” is good when it wants to acquire only what it needs now and in the near future.
So, you see, that “greed” can be an asset or a liability.
Why this interest now?
Because “greed” is seldom debated in a total.
“Greed” signifies “bad”. Seldom do the people see “greed” as something, sometimes “good”!
In light of this article, can you now have a resonable discussion of “greed”?
Sunday, February 3, 2008
Government - #101 - #67 - Dear Candidates, We rebelled against England once....
How do you candidates determine trust?...
Do you candidates talk in issues, blogs, or paraphrases?...
How to you candidates determine if you are for the political parties or for the American people? …
How do you candidates judge the American people’s voice….for or against?
These are some of the questions that should be asked and answered by the current candidates.
Since starting this Blog the Author has addressed many of the current topics that are being discussed and debated today. Such newer things as ….Can this Government survive the competition among parties to the detriment of the American people? … Are the so-called “Leaders” really both competent and able to “Lead”? … Can the America as we know it stand the incompetent assault to its treasury from both the War and the unauthorized “earmarks”? … Does the vote by the ordinary American people mean anything? …
This leads inevitably to the question “Is revolution the only answer?”
The Author is serious! A bloody, street like revolution is the ordinary people’s answer to their frustrations. Check the small, foreign countries! When the secret police and the well paid Army get overwhelmed by the ordinary citizen the reaction is Revolution! It is remote but “possible”!
The present debates, by the various candidates, mirror what the Blog is talking about…. the terrible conditions in Washington, the distance between the parties, (and yes, the candidates), the lack of leadership and communication from the Government and the frustration of the American public at large.(which keeps growing!)
Again, this leads inevitably to the question “Is revolution the only answer?”
Do you candidates talk in issues, blogs, or paraphrases?...
How to you candidates determine if you are for the political parties or for the American people? …
How do you candidates judge the American people’s voice….for or against?
These are some of the questions that should be asked and answered by the current candidates.
Since starting this Blog the Author has addressed many of the current topics that are being discussed and debated today. Such newer things as ….Can this Government survive the competition among parties to the detriment of the American people? … Are the so-called “Leaders” really both competent and able to “Lead”? … Can the America as we know it stand the incompetent assault to its treasury from both the War and the unauthorized “earmarks”? … Does the vote by the ordinary American people mean anything? …
This leads inevitably to the question “Is revolution the only answer?”
The Author is serious! A bloody, street like revolution is the ordinary people’s answer to their frustrations. Check the small, foreign countries! When the secret police and the well paid Army get overwhelmed by the ordinary citizen the reaction is Revolution! It is remote but “possible”!
The present debates, by the various candidates, mirror what the Blog is talking about…. the terrible conditions in Washington, the distance between the parties, (and yes, the candidates), the lack of leadership and communication from the Government and the frustration of the American public at large.(which keeps growing!)
Again, this leads inevitably to the question “Is revolution the only answer?”
Friday, February 1, 2008
Family - #401 - #03 – What’s a “father”?
(Sperm donors are NOT fathers.)
Now, how about “What’s a father?”
May I define “a father”?
A “father” should include considerations of the following:
a. Does the “sperm” donor have to be “the father”? Can a “father” not be a “sperm donor”? Is the “giver of the beginning of life” just that …. “the giver of the beginning of life” … and not necessarily anything more? Does mere biology determine a “father”?
b. Should a “father” be just a “provider” or a “protector”? Or, should he be both? Can a “non- provider or a non-protector be a good “father”?
c. Should a “father” be a husband and a father? Should one side be more important than the other? How do you balance the two?
d. Doesn’t “father” denote a special relationship with children? Would you agree that “husband” denotes a special relationship with a “wife”? Well, what is included as part of this “special relationship with children”?
e. Let’s make an attempt to list some of the ideas included in this “special relationship”:
1. A father can give an appropriate physical, “touchy/ feely” masculine contact to a child.
2. A father can give a warm appropriate “masculine” presence to a child. The child feels the difference between female and male. Animals recognize the difference. What if the child never feels a warm “masculine” presence? Is there a deficiency? Is it meaningful?
3. A father can share his past experience in a special way. This “special relationship” means a great deal. It makes communication more personal, less a matter of “facts and impersonal information”.
4. A father can give a child another point of view, another “slant” on things different from his other parent or acquaintance. Because of this “special relationship”, this communication may have a deeper meaning …may have more importance. This “special relationship” can give a different kind of communication than an “outsider”. (Note: The success of this depends on the abilities, desires, motivation , and intellect of the so-called “father”!!)
f. What if there is “NO” father? What is lost? What, if anything, can replace a “father”? (That’s certainly something to, at least, consider!)
Now, do you think the definition of a “father” is so simple. Doesn’t it seem obvious that this word requires deep consideration … consideration from many sides ….many points of view!!! It certainly is not obvious what a father might be to you!!! How about to someone else!!!
******************
And that’s just about a “father”!!
How about the difference between a “man” and a “father”?
May I try to define a “man”?
A “man”, just a “man”, should include considerations of the following:
a. “Just a man” indicates “maleness” but no apparent “special relationship”.
b. “Just a man” indicates certain generally accepted “male” traits such as : physical strength and “combativeness”, provider, protector, gruffness, competitive etc. But suppose “this particular man” is not particularly “physical or combative” or competitive? Is he less of a man? Or, is he just a “different” man? ….Hmmmm!
c. “Just a man” may have many different desires according to the “man” in question. Yes! ….. “BUT ALL men are…….” … Really??
Could it be that each “man” could be slightly different? That “each man” could still be a “man” but be different?
Could it be that a generalization of “a man” is overly simple … meaningless? Should we even use the term except in the most non-specific context?
Could it be that “oversimplification” really means “labels” and “labels” do not add to understanding!!
“A man” is simpler to define than a “father”.
That’s true!
But it’s still not “simple”!!
Now, how about “What’s a father?”
May I define “a father”?
A “father” should include considerations of the following:
a. Does the “sperm” donor have to be “the father”? Can a “father” not be a “sperm donor”? Is the “giver of the beginning of life” just that …. “the giver of the beginning of life” … and not necessarily anything more? Does mere biology determine a “father”?
b. Should a “father” be just a “provider” or a “protector”? Or, should he be both? Can a “non- provider or a non-protector be a good “father”?
c. Should a “father” be a husband and a father? Should one side be more important than the other? How do you balance the two?
d. Doesn’t “father” denote a special relationship with children? Would you agree that “husband” denotes a special relationship with a “wife”? Well, what is included as part of this “special relationship with children”?
e. Let’s make an attempt to list some of the ideas included in this “special relationship”:
1. A father can give an appropriate physical, “touchy/ feely” masculine contact to a child.
2. A father can give a warm appropriate “masculine” presence to a child. The child feels the difference between female and male. Animals recognize the difference. What if the child never feels a warm “masculine” presence? Is there a deficiency? Is it meaningful?
3. A father can share his past experience in a special way. This “special relationship” means a great deal. It makes communication more personal, less a matter of “facts and impersonal information”.
4. A father can give a child another point of view, another “slant” on things different from his other parent or acquaintance. Because of this “special relationship”, this communication may have a deeper meaning …may have more importance. This “special relationship” can give a different kind of communication than an “outsider”. (Note: The success of this depends on the abilities, desires, motivation , and intellect of the so-called “father”!!)
f. What if there is “NO” father? What is lost? What, if anything, can replace a “father”? (That’s certainly something to, at least, consider!)
Now, do you think the definition of a “father” is so simple. Doesn’t it seem obvious that this word requires deep consideration … consideration from many sides ….many points of view!!! It certainly is not obvious what a father might be to you!!! How about to someone else!!!
******************
And that’s just about a “father”!!
How about the difference between a “man” and a “father”?
May I try to define a “man”?
A “man”, just a “man”, should include considerations of the following:
a. “Just a man” indicates “maleness” but no apparent “special relationship”.
b. “Just a man” indicates certain generally accepted “male” traits such as : physical strength and “combativeness”, provider, protector, gruffness, competitive etc. But suppose “this particular man” is not particularly “physical or combative” or competitive? Is he less of a man? Or, is he just a “different” man? ….Hmmmm!
c. “Just a man” may have many different desires according to the “man” in question. Yes! ….. “BUT ALL men are…….” … Really??
Could it be that each “man” could be slightly different? That “each man” could still be a “man” but be different?
Could it be that a generalization of “a man” is overly simple … meaningless? Should we even use the term except in the most non-specific context?
Could it be that “oversimplification” really means “labels” and “labels” do not add to understanding!!
“A man” is simpler to define than a “father”.
That’s true!
But it’s still not “simple”!!
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